Have YOU found that thing!?

That thing that tickles ya fancy, as they say, floats ya boat, rocks ya socks. I found that thing when I was quite young, it came in the form of an invitation. A casual but sincere gesture from Miss Melanie Thompson*, to our entire class, inviting us to her wedding ceremony. 

It was a perfect day- Blue skies, the sun was shining, and I can still visualise the park set up with white chairs and an arch, overlooking the ocean, and a huge clear marquee filled with twinkling lights, crisp white linen on the tables, fresh flowers and a dance floor - promises of a perfect evening. My teacher, barely recognisable, now a princess, in a sparkly white gown, holding a beautiful bouquet. A smile bigger than our classroom, having petals hurled at her face as she made her way back down the aisle as Mrs Melanie Smith*. 

What I didn’t realise until many years later, was how significant that invitation was. How attending that day as a little girl ignited a drive in me to be involved in more wonderful occasions like that.

I’ve spent many years working in weddings and at venues - waitressing, planning and managing weddings. 12, 14, 16 hour days of setting up, back to back meetings, delivery and packing down. Working with suppliers and couples to create their dream day. I’ve seen hundreds of weddings, and have many magical memories to share. Stories of lovely couples, beautiful decorations and happy wedding days with families coming together peacefully to celebrate, but most people aren’t interested in those. You want disasters! You want to hear about people tripping down the aisle, groomsmen who forgot the rings, or runaway brides! Something about humans makes us more interested in the tragic, unfortunate and painful stories. I have plenty of those too, and a tip for anyone planning their wedding - buttercream icing and direct sunlight are not a good combination. 

I worked with one couple to plan a surprise wedding. They invited guests to their  engagement party where the MC got up to announce there had been a double booking for the venue that evening and a wedding was due to start soon.  When everyone realised what was happening, the energy in the space was electrifying! The excited guests were herded into a room where the ceremony took place. During that time, we redecorated, bringing out candles, balloons, cake and a guest book. We were in a gorgeous building, over 100 years old with brick walls and a very high wooden ceiling with exposed beams. I took a full tray of champagne flutes and stood near the 2 large doors, waiting for the newlyweds and their witnesses to make their way back into the main space. It turned out, in our hastiness to set up, the helium balloon on the table next to me had been placed just a little bit too close to the candle next to it. At the exact moment the doors opened, the ribbon of the balloon caught fire and it detached from the weight holding it down. 

Working in hospitality teaches you to smile. NO.MATTER.WHAT. To contain your feelings while in eye sight of guests, to be poised, and carefully consider which words you might use, then, express your true feelings to whoever happens to be in the kitchen, and drink your worries after your shift. 

So. I stood frozen. My heart racing, panicking, my mind racing even faster - Is this a heritage building!? Fuck! The beams will catch fire for sure, should I go and get the firehose, or call 111. Fuck! I can’t evacuate this wedding, it’ll ruin their day! Did I put the candle there!? Fuck!

But, smiling, holding my tray, as I watched the balloon head for the rafters, while the flames rapidly made their way up the ribbon.

Miraculously the balloon popped and the couple were showered in gold confetti. They looked delighted at the unexpected surprise they thought I had arranged, thanked me, and took a glass from my tray. I was SO relieved but looking around, I don’t think anyone else had seen it. The staff were busy pouring drinks, most of the guests were still in the other room. Did that really just happen!? 

I’ve realised throughout my career that planning weddings and executing them seamlessly involves a lot of miracles. But most of the work is preventing disasters. Having foresight, and making quick decisions, usually without the couple or the guests having any idea of what could have gone wrong during their special day. 

Running a wedding smoothly is having clean tissues in your pocket, and knowing how to pin on a corsage. It’s rushing to the shop for more limes when everyone wants to drink Corona’s all night, and giving hungry kiddies their dinner earlier than the adults. It’s putting a glass of water in front of the groomsman who drank more than his fair share of those Coronas, finding a blanket for grandma and having spare microphone batteries handy. It’s dimming the lights after dinner so people aren’t too shy to dance and making sure the photographer got their meal. 

My passion, and my thing - working in weddings, and after years of experience, is knowing that candles and curling ribbon shouldn’t be too close together

*Name changed